Blunt Horoscopes: Astrology for the High Life
Picture Courtesy of Author
March Horoscope Overview
Overall, March is a pretty good month despite a few bumpy moments. The month begins with a beautiful sextile between the Sun in Pisces and Jupiter in Taurus on March 1st. This is a friendly aspect that feels expansive, lucky, and optimistic. You can use this day to ask for a raise, go to a job interview, ask out your crush, or pitch a new client. On March 9th, the Sun will make the same aspect to Uranus, also in Taurus. You may get a surprising or exciting bit of good news at this time. If you make a strategic request on March 1st you might hear back favorably around March 9th.
March 8th will be particularly difficult for focused, disciplined work because Mercury will conjunct Neptune in Pisces. This can be an excellent time to pack a bowl, put on some music, and stare at the art on your walls. No doubt, you’ll find some sort of inspiration. If you have an important deadline on March 8th, try to get the work done well in advance because you definitely won’t want to do it that Friday.
March 10th is the new moon in Pisces, and it’s especially lovely! Jupiter rules the new moon, and it’s able to witness the show from its place in Taurus. This makes the new moon extra potent and lucky. If you’re looking to begin a new habit, or if you want to take a chance on something, March 10th is the time to do it. New moons are used to initiate beginnings, while full moons are better for culminations.
On March 17th, the Sun will conjunct Neptune. This is St. Patrick’s Day in the United States, which is typically celebrated through the overconsumption of alcohol. If you choose to imbibe, please use caution. The Sun-Neptune aspect can loosen inhibitions even without the booze. If you choose to indulge in other substances, please use caution and only buy from people you trust. This is not a good day to experiment with new substances or new suppliers.
On March 25th we have the first of two eclipses. Eclipses are always big news in astrology because they’re like a celestial power surge. This year we have two eclipses, (the second will be on April 8th). The first one is a lunar eclipse in Libra. Something to do with law, justice, or partnerships, (all things that Libra rules) could be coming to completion. Eclipses generally bring powerful endings and powerful beginnings. If this seems intense, try not to worry. We get a set of two eclipses twice every year; you have lived through all of them.
Art Courtesy of Casey Renteria
Aries: March Horoscope (March 21 - April 19)
You might find that you’ve got your head in the clouds this month, Aries. Pisces rules your 12th house of isolation, secrets, the subconscious, and spirituality. For most of March, we have four, and sometimes five planets in the sign of Pisces. It’s only natural if you’re having trouble focusing, or if you’re unusually sleepy at this time. If weed tends to make you sleepy, then it could be a good time for a tolerance break. You’ll get your mojo back when the Sun moves into your first house on March 19th.
Taurus: March Horoscope (April 20 - May 20)
Have you been looking for a new community? On March 22nd, Venus, your planetary ruler, will enter Pisces and your 11th house of social groups, friends, hopes, and aspirations. Astrologers say that Venus is “exalted” in Pisces, which means that it’s extra powerful and free to work its best magic. This is great news for you because the 11th house is one of the most auspicious places in the zodiac and Venus loves being in Pisces. If you’re looking for a new group of like-minded stoners, this is the time to go looking.
Remember - you won’t make new friends sitting at home in your living room; you have to circulate out in the world to take advantage of this transit. Move quickly because Venus will move to Aries on April 4th.
Gemini: March Horoscope (May 21 - June 20)
On March 10th, Mercury, your planetary ruler, will sextile Pluto. Mercury will be in your 10th house of career, fame, and awards at that time. This aspect can help you get to the heart of the matter, whatever “it” is. If someone has been having trouble hearing your needs, this is the day to speak up. Go ahead and schedule that difficult conversation with a coworker, or supervisor. This aspect will help you speak truth to power or clarify your boundaries. Tough conversations aren’t easy, but on this day you’re the most likely to be heard. Don’t forget your listening skills!
Cancer: March Horoscope (June 21 - July 22)
Pack your bags, Cancer. This month, the new moon on March 10th falls in your 9th house of long-distance travel, higher education, broadcasting, faith, and spirituality. This can be a wonderful time to take a trip, especially if it’s near water. You might also be considering going back to school, gaining an additional certification, or starting a new mindfulness routine. Any of those endeavors are likely to be successful at this time. Lastly, if you haven’t already explored the connection between cannabis and meditation, this is a great time to start.
Leo: March Horoscope (July 23 - August 22)
You’re known for your outgoing personality, Leo. But this month might have you feeling moodier than normal. The Sun is in Pisces, which rules your 8th house of the occult, shamanism, altered states of consciousness, sex, and death. Take this opportunity to spend more time with your tarot cards, channel your spirit guides, or become a regular at the local metaphysical shop.
Remember - sex magic can be done by any number of participants, even just one. You might even consider experimenting with microdosing. If you do, please use caution: start low, go slow!
Virgo: March Horoscope (August 23 - September 21)
This month, most of the planetary activity is taking place in your 7th house of committed partnerships Virgo. You might be ready to take a romantic relationship to the next level of commitment, or you might be considering inking a business deal with a new partner. Either way, the new moon on March 10th is the perfect time to make your wishes known. It’s also possible that your partner has a lot going on in their life and needs your support at this time. Try to strike the balance between being dependable and being codependent.
Libra: March Horoscope (September 22 - October 22)
On March 28th, Venus is in Pisces, and your 6th house of health, daily routines, and self-care will make a sextile to Uranus in your 8th house of shamanism, altered states of consciousness, and mystery. This is likely to be an important moment for you because Venus is the planetary ruler of Libra. You may have a sudden bolt of inspiration during a smoke session, especially relating to health routines or self-care habits. Some aspects of your daily routine could be made to work could better support your needs for self-care. When the moment of clarity strikes, jot it down.
Scorpio: March Horoscope (October 23 - November 21)
What a dreamy month, Scorpio! Most of the planetary activity is taking place in your 5th house of art, pleasure, love, entertainment, athleticism, and children. If you have children, expect most of the month to run smoothly. The little crotch goblins are more likely than normal to finish their homework and their chores on time. If you have a special someone, you’re going to want to spend a lot of them with that person. Go ahead and indulge, because the Sun will move into your 6th house on March 19th. Buy your sweetheart some “flowers,” then have a sweet, smoke session for two.
Sagittarius: March Horoscope (November 22 - December 21)
How does your home serve your mental health needs? Is your living environment relaxed and inviting, or is it more tense? On March 28th Venus in your 4th house of home, family, ancestors, and origin stories will sextile Jupiter in your 6th house of service, responsibility, daily routines, and self-care. This is a great time to recommit to any self-care routines or think up new ones. If your home isn’t serving your needs, this is the time to make adjustments. Set new boundaries with your roommates, or rearrange your space so that it functions the way that you need.
Capricorn: March Horoscope (December 22 - January 19)
On March 21st Venus, the planet of love, beauty, and peace will conjunct your planetary ruler: Saturn. Think of a fractal image and the incredible beauty that’s possible in precise order; that’s the magic of Saturn and Venus together. This is a wonderful day to sanitize your pipes and re-organize your stash drawer. (How long has it been since you did that?) Any activity that combines beauty with optimal structure will reap benefits.
Aquarius: March Horoscope (January 20 - February 18)
On March 21st the Sun in Aries, and your third house of communication, your neighborhood, and your siblings will sextile Pluto in your first house of self, identity, and personality. You might recover something you’d previously lost, or you might uncover a new personal truth. The astrology of this moment feels like a sort of excavation: something hidden will come into the light. Another possibility is that a friend you haven’t heard from in ages reaches out to you. Be ready for a surprise on this day.
Pisces: March Horoscope (February 19 - March 20)
This is your month, Pisces! The new moon on March 10th will fall in your 1st house of self, identity, physical health, and personal values. If you slacked on your New Year’s Resolutions, this is the perfect time to recommit to whatever goals you had at the beginning of the year. The first house is one of the most personal houses; so you can use this new moon to initiate almost any changes you want. Ask yourself who you want to be in the coming year, then take steps.